A friend is one that knows you as you are, understands where you have been, accepts what you have become, and still gently allows you to grow - William Shakespeare

I'm not old, but I can say that I've lived long enough to make some observations on the phenomenon of friendship. There are three kinds of friendships: 

a) Friends you make from places you have to be: 
These include friends from school, uni or work. You are friends because you have classes together or because you have no-one else to hang out with. I'm not trying to undermine these friendships, because they can turn out to be the best ones, but in my experience, I've generally not been able to take these friendships to a deeper level. Of course I've had exceptions, but usually when you graduate or move to a different job, these friendships quickly drift apart. Sure you try to catch up once or twice, but you can't deny the fact that it's the circumstance that held your friendships together. When you get busier, either one of you doesn't put in the effort, and what you had in common is no longer there. 

b) Friends you make from childhood: 
These include friends from preschool (back when it still existed)/childcare/primary school friends, church friends (I grew up going to church). These friendships bring back the most memories. Back then, it was so simple and everything was so fun. We did life together and grew up together. We went to watch movies, do craft, have sleepovers together and a whole bunch of other things. As you grow up, take different paths, go through different life phases/stages, develop your personality and identity, you realise it's harder to get along with these friends like you used to just because of differentiation. This is completely natural, and it will happen. You start to rethink the friendship you had in the past and sometimes wish it was the way it was back in the day. 

c) Friends that stick: 
These friends come from the locations listed in categories a and b. I only have a few of these friends, but they are the ones who not only 'click' with me, but are supportive, open and honest, can connect on a deeper level, willing to share and show your vulnerabilities/struggles and put in the effort to keep the relationship going. Even when life tries to drive us apart through busy schedules, distance, emotional troubles, competition, ups and downs, we stick together. Because that's what a strong friendship is. It does not waver in times of distress, or falter from competing attention of significant others. It loves, shares, comforts, encourages, invests and enjoys each other's company. It is accepting, no matter what stage of life you are in, or how much you have changed over the years. 

Wikipedia strikes again: 
It defines the love between friends as 'Philia'. (Greek: φιλία). Friendship is the strong bond existing between people who share common interest or activity. C.S. Lewis wrote a book called The Four Loves, which explores the nature of love from a Christian and philosophical perspective. In it, he describes it as, "the least biological, organic, instinctive, gregarious and necessary.. the least natural of loves". He claims this is because our species does not need friendship in order to reproduce, but to the classical and medieval worlds the more profound precisely because it is freely chosen. Apparently true friendships, like the friendship between David and Jonathan in the Bible, are almost a lost art. The modern society ignores friendship - to the Ancients, friendship seemed to be the happiest and most fully human of all loves; the crown of life and the school of virtue. Friendship grows out of companionship and appreciation, but due to our lack of experience in this, we cannot value its worth in its fullness. 

I must admit, for the past few years, I did not see the importance in investing in friendships. I thought to myself, "If they don't put in the effort, why should I?" I detached myself from people because I was sick of dealing with problems, and putting up with conversations that seemed to waste my time. Thankfully, God opened my eyes to my own selfishness as I realised that I had actually stopped caring about my friends. As a result, I've had to deal with and put in two or three times the effort to mend the repercussions of my foolish decisions. God loves us all unconditionally (Agape love, the strongest of all the loves), and as His child, I have been called to share His unconditional love to not only my friends, but my enemies. This is no easy task, in fact it's impossible for humanity. It goes against logical or individualistic thoughts. Why would I disadvantage myself and put myself in a worse position, when the other ungrateful person doesn't reciprocate? But that's exactly what God did for us. He gave us everything, the world, and yet we broke our relationship with Him by sinning and wanting to do things our own way, when clearly His way is perfect and the best for us. Yet when we were caught up in our sin and didn't want anything to do with Him, He loved us, that He took the initiative to mend our broken relationship. He sent His Son to die to bear the punishment for our sin and make us right with Him. THIS is love. God's love compels me to love others like He loved me. It is only by the Holy Spirt that he enables me to do this. It is not natural for humans to love those who do not love us in return. It's God. God IS love. His very nature encompasses love. He shows us what love is, and teaches us how to love through his actions and words. 

I encourage you to reflect on your own friendships. What kind of friend are you? Do you share on a deeper level with your friends? Do you support them through life, or even ask them how they're going? I'm by no means the friendship guru this post makes me out to be, I'm still trying to figure this out. Just wanted to share my thoughts and help myself gather my own. :) To my friends out there, whatever friend you are to me, you're precious. I'm thankful for all the moments we've spent time together, all the times you've put up with my unenthusiasm/craziness/uncaring attitude. Some last words of advice, friendship matters. I realised that friendship is an extra bit of warmth in your heart. It's a hug or a shoulder to cry on when you encounter a setback. It's a huge grin when you see that other person, or a laugh so hard you can't even breathe. Take time out and do simple things together. You'll learn to appreciate the true value of it.

It's been a while

Indeed it has. Simply because I have not gathered enough motivation to do so. Just got stuff to do at the end of the day and I get tired pretty easily so no energy. These days I don't even know what to blog about. We're up to week 12 now so it's not long until the crazy exam period. I have to say though, this semester has been the easiest I've ever had. So chill - probably because there's more practical stuff to get us ready for placement next sem. I'm excited to see where God takes me, and I know it'll be a fantastic experience. But then again, there goes my already tiny income. God has blessed me with a good family and boyfriend who are willing to support me for that time, but I'm happy to chip into the money I've saved over the last 2 years. It'll definitely be enough, I just have to keep telling myself I'll earn the money I spend in the 12 months in much less than a month if I can find a job.

Yesterday, mum and I went to the city to get stuff done and stopped at temt to have a look. I've been in desperate need of jeans for a long long time now - my old pair I got in 2008. They were skinny jeans but I've worn them so much they are stretched out and look like straight jeans, and the bum and knee area are so white. Yes, I have looked for jeans but I've never managed to find a pair that will actually fit me. Either the legs are too tight and the waist is too big, or the other way round. Always no good. I must have been going through an awkward body shape phase, or maybe I'm just asian and short. Nevertheless, I finally find a pair that was stretchyish and fit well. Saw some jeans at temt, so I thought why not.. it's probably not going to fit but I have nothing else to do while my mum looks at clothes. It fit like a glove :') So I had to get it. I took interest in the collared shirt because I've been wearing tights for the past year or so and I don't have longer tops which cover my bum. I cannot remember the last time I wore a collared shirt (maybe in high school haha), so this is an item of clothing I am unfamiliar with, but I thought I would give it a try. If I like it, I might invest in more, but one is enough for me now. The bow was on sale, and just to spice up my boring black forest of hair. By the way, don't get me wrong - I'm not one of those people who post up all the clothes they buy, but this was kind of a momentous occasion just because I can't remember the last time I bought clothes. Okay now that I think of it, it was probably at the start of this year when I went to Melbourne... but that was nearly half a year ago. Just happy I guess :)

Oh and another thing, I'm starting to really enjoy going to BSF. It's such a drag for me still, being so time consuming and all, but I've really gotten a lot out of it. God is using the book of Matthew to teach me so much about Jesus, encourage me, and prompt me to examine myself. I'm even starting to enjoy the hymns! We sing out of a hymn book and all the songs are pretty old fashioned. I'm realising though that there's something unique about hymns, and singing with a whole bunch of ladies makes me happy and appreciative, especially when one of the girls in my group sings some really tricky harmony so damn well! Even the drive to and from the church is enjoyable because I can have a chat with my friend in the car. I hope God keeps me in Brisbane so I can continue to attend, and keep getting so much of this rich spiritual food.

Wow such a long post this ended up to be. Anyways, with that being said, I should do some BSF homework

It is finished!

A year ago, on the 1st of February 2013, Jeff and I commenced this "read-the-bible-in-a-year plan". It involved reading 3-4 chapters of the Old Testament and 2-3 chapters of the New Testament each day for one year. This challenge was prompted by my wise and godly sunday school teacher. She said, "how can you call yourself a Christian if you haven't even read the whole bible at least once?" I couldn't agree more. It got me thinking of how to achieve this. I talked to J and he suggested choosing a random website on google. This was the one (highly recommended). It lets you choose which day to start reading, what version of the bible you want to read and how to split up the passages (e.g. OT --> NT or OT/NT each day). N

Now, I had tried to stick to reading the bible previously, but I had never really succeeded. I was always "too tired" or "couldn't be bothered". It was a leap of faith as I asked God to help me persevere with this. At first, J and I kept ourselves going by assigning a 'punishment' to the one who forgot/skipped a day of reading (shouting the other person green tea ice-cream). However, as we did our bible reading day-by-day, it got easier, and eventually we fell into a routine of doing so. I admit that I skipped about six days of reading, and Jeffy only skipped out on one or two. Rain or shine, travel or home, energetic or sleepy, joyful or angry, the bible had been read!

Here are some screenshots of the last few passages of the bible: 

Malachi 4

Revelation 22

I remember during a sermon from a while ago, someone said words along the lines of this: "Isn't it amazing that the Old Testament ends with God bringing about a curse on men. Compare that to how the New Testament ends in Revelation - it ends with a blessing of Jesus' grace upon the saints (those who accept Christ as their Lord and Saviour). The gospel (what God has done for man in Jesus Christ) has turned a curse into a blessing. We have been pardoned from the penalty of our sin (death), and given something we do not deserve (eternal life with our Creator God) - all due to the infinite love of God." 

So what now? Personally, I plan to study the bible in more depth. Reading the bible through this plan has given me an overview of the bible, but now is the time for detail. I will use my application bible to study shorter passages and meditate on God's word. Ignite strand group #2 definitely sparked a curiosity for the area of biblical theology and the Old Testament in me. I'm now reading the Goldsworthy Trilogy by Greame Goldsworthy, a theological professor in these two areas! I'm nearly finished the first book Gospel in Kingdom, and it has helped me develop a greater understanding of how the different epochs (periods of time/era) in the bible all point to the gospel. Biblical Theology is the process of interpreting what the bible says, and that's what I aim to do this year (at least). It's a pretty ambitions goal, but then again, reading the bible in one year was too! 

For those struggling to read the bible, especially the dryer sections, the more you read, meditate, understand and apply, the more you will thirst for the Word of God. It is our spiritual food, which gives us strength to live out our lives in a joy, faith and hope that only comes from our Father in heaven.

Ignite Training Conference 2014

What a week! Praise God that a whole bunch of us have had a solid week of spiritual food, equipping us to serve more effectively in ministry. It was definitely a very full on conference, with a talk in the morning, followed by strand groups, an afternoon workshop and a night talk everyday. 

The theme of the conference was 'Church Matters' with LT Hopper and Peter Lin coming to speak with us. They were crazy good and I learnt a lot about what it means to be God's people and how to go through ministry and life serving Him. Lots of the sermons were pretty challenging (which I really liked). I don't remember a lot of things, but I remember Steve Nation saying this: "Sound theology being preached should flick the comfortable, and comfort the afflicted" - AMEN!

I attended Ignite for the first time two years ago in 2011 with NATMAN and I found it really difficult to keep up with the strand content. Because of this, I decided not to attend last year so I could grow in knowledge and be better prepared to learn as much as I can. I think the plan worked. This year I completed strand 2 YAAAY! :)) 

Steve, Eric, Ezekiel and I went to Yuen Si Hong to get some asian snacks for morning tea.
We tried to get the cheapest of everything and ended up getting pandaroo jellies
which not many people liked. Oh well. 

J: Give me the grapes Fer Fer
F: You're not getting any grapes off me! 

As a group outing, we went to Celia's parent's house. It was crazy cool!!! They have a huge pond with an island in the middle. The grass looks really cool to roll in but don't be deceived! There's HEAPS of geese poop everywhere. 

Celia's dad built this bridge. What a handyman dude! 

Dragonfruit is growing on the island!
Steve and Josh picked some and cut it up for us to eat.
Tasted much better than the ones we bought from the supermarket! :) 

We all tried to be Nat doing her 90 degrees peace sign :) 

Strand 2: Biblical Theology

I'm no expert, strand two helped us to understand the old testament and how it fits in the big picture of the bible. We studied the passage of Jeremiah 23:1-8 which talked about God bringing judgement upon the evil shepherds and promising to raise up a righteous Branch who will save His people and gather them back to Him. This event will be so great and unforgettable that it will make the exodus seem insignificant and forgettable!

It was so so interesting learning from Steve and Celia - two awesome, godly and knowledgable strand group leaders. I was trying to soak up everything they said like a sponge - I learnt so much! I have always wanted to delve into the old testament to a greater extent than just reading it and moving on, but I've never quite known how to approach it. But this week in strand group, my yearning to study God's word has been ignited ha.. hahaha. Here are some general things I have learnt: 

1. Everything in the bible is there for a reason - we just need to work harder to figure out the relevance 

2. There is always connection between any passage to Jesus

3. There's a concordance at the back of my bible! So useful for BT

4. There are many different ways to approach/understand a passage of the OT (Steve printed out an article for us)

5. The general history and geographical migrations of Israel that represents the current state of their relationship with God

There have been so many mind blowing moments during this week it's crazy. Here are some books that Steve brought along to show us. I'm particularly interested in reading The Goldsworthy Trilogy and An Introduction to the Old Testament. 

Thursday Night: Came home and wrote my bible study (with Jeffy's company and help). I had a much firmer understanding and direction this year compared to two years ago (my strand one leader made me redo my bible study because it 'wasn't good enough' :( sad). We split off to girls and guys and I presented my bible study to Celia and Theolynn. It was really good getting some comments and feedback. There were one or two things to improve in the questions, but overall I did a pretty good job. I'm glad I have this skill now! 

It was now the leader's turn to present their take on Jer 23. Celia did a fantastic kid's talk which focussed on Jesus being the good shepherd who looks after His sheep. Whenever she mentioned 'bad shepherd' we all had to do a big 'booooo' and when she mentioned the 'good shepherd' we all shouted 'hooray'!!! It was really fun and kid friendly. Steve on the other hand did a sermon. He handed out his outline and pretty much read it out. It was pretty good (I've always been interested to see how pastors plan out their sermons and what their notes look like. Now I finally have a copy hehe)!! 

To top our last strand group time together we had a few games of Articulate. We went around the circle and described as many words as we can in one minute. The categories we chose were random, object and nature. I finished with a score of 27 making me the winner yaaay! :) It was all that taboo practice I reckon haha. I sucked at guessing though - wow my group members are so sharp!

Last but not least, FOOOOOOOD. Wow the cooks cooked up some pretty fine meals! Spaghetti, wombok, beef brisket, carrot and potato, chicken wings, slow cooked pork in sweet bread, curry, beans, mushroom, RICE and more! Everybody was so grateful for this service - isn't it great that we can all serve God in so many ways?!

Unique God

In this world, there are many different religions whose members claim to worship the one true god.  As a Christian, I believe that the true God, the One I worship has three major characteristics. Let me expand on this. God is all-loving, which means that he will have our best interests in mind and will do what is beneficial to us. As an all-powerful God, He is capable of making anything happen when he wills it. He is also all-knowing, so He is not only smarter and wiser than anyone who ever existed, but He is aware of every thought, action and status of everything of this universe - past, present and future. 

Here is a hypothetical situation: A child is about to be hit by a car and God is present in this situation.
I hope this makes sense.. here goes!
1. God is all-loving, but is not all-powerful and all-knowing.
This basically makes God ... well not a God. Humans are capable of loving. We love our parents, siblings, spouses, friends, yet we are not gods. If God is not all-powerful and not all-knowing, then what makes Him any different from us? It certainly makes Him a petty God. He will try to stop the child from being hit by the car (because letting the child die is not in the child's best interests), but He won't be able to stop the event from happening. Therefore, the outcome for the child is death.

2. God is all-powerful and all-knowing but not all-loving.
This makes God a dictator - with us as His minions. We worship Him out of fear. If something goes wrong, it's because we displeased Him or made Him angry *shudders at the thought*. This is not a God who I would willingly worship. I would feel obliged to worship Him so that He can bless me or keep bad things from happening, and not because He is a good God. In the hypothetical situation, God has the power to stop the child's death, knows the child is going to die, but doesn't care for the child and just lets him die.

3. God is all-loving, all-powerful but not all-knowing.
Yes, He will do what is in our best interests, and yes He can make things happen, but if God is like this, He will operate under our ethical code. If present in the situation, us humans will do what is possible to save the child from the car. Why? Because we don't know the future. What if the child is Adolf Hitler? Saving one life will result in the death of many, many more people. But a God who is all-knowing, all-loving and all-powerful will do what is for the greater good and probably let the child die, even if He has the power to stop the child's death.

In conclusion, the combination of being all-loving, all-powerful and all-knowing results in a God who has got our backs and will do the best for us because He knows what's up basically. We can firmly put our trust in Him because as limited beings, we don't know what's going to happen, we don't have the power to change outcomes, and we don't know what's best for ourselves (despite thinking we do most of the time). With this in mind, I WANT to worship God, and I want to place my life in His hands.This is what makes Him unique.